10 Courteous Habits That Might Be Annoying People Around You

Social interactions require courtesy. Without it, gatherings, work meetings, and other situations where you spend time with others can become unpleasant. Interestingly, courtesy can be overdone, and well-intentioned habits can cross the line from considerate to annoying. Although rooted in good intentions, these overly polite behaviors can irritate those around us. Here are ten courteous habits that, while intended to be helpful and kind, often have the opposite effect.

Over-apologizing

A simple “sorry” goes a long way toward reconciliation. However, it is possible to overdo it. Some people think it’s annoying to repeatedly apologize for minor mistakes or things out of one’s control. To some, it diminishes the impact of genuine apologies. It may also make others uncomfortable or obligated to reassure you, which can be tiring.

Excessive Politeness

There is a time for politeness and a time to give it a break. In situations where directness is necessary, being overly civil can slow down communication and decision-making processes. An example is if a colleague needs honest feedback from you. Here, excessive good manners can hinder the clarity and usefulness of your input.

Interrupting with Niceties

If you want to say something pleasant to a person, wait until they finish talking. Refrain from interrupting someone mid-sentence, even to offer a compliment or nice comment. It can disrupt their train of thought and ruin effective communication. One of the worst places to do this is in professional or serious conversations because flow and clarity are non-negotiable.

Over-thanking

When someone does something for us or gives us something, we should tell them we appreciate it. Doing it once or twice is nice, but more than that, it may become a problem. Repeated thanks for minor favors or tasks can become irritating, as it may seem like you overemphasize trivial actions. The person you’re thanking may even begin to feel patronized or uncomfortable.

Hesitating to Express Opinions

A little delay to consider your opinions before sharing them is advisable, as it’ll save you from saying hurtful or dumb things. It helps to be less cautious sometimes. Being too careful or deferential about sharing your opinions can make you appear indecisive or uninterested. This can be particularly problematic in group settings where time is of the essence and important decisions must be made.

Overly Formal Speech

Keep formal language for your bosses at work or when making presentations in settings that suit it. It’s not for a fun time with your friends. If you go excessively formal in casual settings, there is a sense of distance, and interactions are stiff. People will assume that you’re not relatable or are trying too hard to impress, and they’ll alienate themselves from you.

Checking in Too Frequently

We all love it when someone shows an interest in our lives. However, when you frequently ask someone if they are okay or if they need help, they may think you are overbearing and intrusive. Yes, your intentions are good, but the other person may feel smothered or assume you don’t trust their competence.

Excessive Compliments

Your friend walks in with the most handsome haircut you’ve ever seen or wearing a dress that makes her look like a million bucks. After the first or second compliment, let it slide. Too many compliments give off vibes of insincerity or make it seem you’re trying too hard for them to like you. Besides making others uncomfortable, they might be pressured to return the compliments.

Constantly Smiling

A smile is indeed the best fashion accessory, so we should all smile more often. Nevertheless, while smiling is generally a positive gesture, some situations demand that you turn it off. Maintaining a smile in somber contexts can come across as insincere, disingenuous, inappropriate, and off-putting.

Deferring Decisions to Others

When you allow others to make decisions occasionally or give them a chance, they feel included and special and perceive you as courteous. But constantly passing this mantle to others to others can make you seem passive and unwilling to take responsibility, which undermines your credibility and leadership. It can be frustrating for those who prefer decisiveness.