Lisa O
Dating has evolved a lot since it first became a term in the early 1900s. To mark another decade passing—let’s look at how dating has changed between two very different generations: Baby Boomers and Millennials. Here are 15 ways millennials and baby boomers date differently.
Breakups Are More Casual Now
Back then, boomers usually made breakups official—almost like they needed to fill out forms. But for millennials, things have gotten murkier. Ever heard of “ghosting”? It’s when someone suddenly stops talking to their partner without explaining why and ignores all attempts to contact them. This leaves the other person feeling rejected, left out, and sad.
Social Media Rules the Dating World
Social media changes how we live and connect with others. Millennials mostly use it, and it’s changed dating a lot. Boomers might not get it because it’s new to them. Social media doesn’t just affect how we build relationships—but also how we show them off to others. It’s like there’s an unspoken scorecard where we count posts, comments, and likes as signs of affection in our relationships.
The Age of Dating Apps
With the rise of social media, dating apps have become important for millennials. Back in the day, boomers had to meet people in person, but now we have apps like Tinder. They give us many options and, sometimes, many not-so-great first dates, all just a swipe away. But it’s not all roses—relying on dating apps means judging people mostly by their short profiles and carefully chosen pictures, which can be tricky.
Closure? It’s Complicated
After a breakup, memories of your ex can haunt you on social media. Today’s connected world means constant reminders that your ex is happy without you. Boomers, without social media, might have had an easier time moving on—without seeing photos that bring back old feelings. They did, however, still risk bumping into an ex around town.
Life’s Milestones: Choose Your Own Adventure
For most of the 20th century, couples followed a typical path: get married, buy a home, and start a family. Unfortunately for many boomers, this often ended in divorce—with many married couples eventually splitting up due to one reason or another. Seeing how marriage affected their parents, it’s no surprise that many millennials are choosing to skip marriage altogether.
Redefining the Nuclear Norm
The typical American family used to be seen as very stable and normal. But since the late 1980s, more and more couples have started getting divorced, changing what families look like. Now, families with divorced parents or just one parent are becoming pretty common—becoming the new normal. A study by Pew Research found that almost a quarter of millennials don’t plan on getting married.
Embracing Non-Monogamy
Different kinds of relationships, like polyamory and open relationships, used to be seen as weird and not accepted by most people. But now they’re becoming more acceptable in society. A 2015 study found that one out of every five Americans said they’ve been in a relationship where they weren’t just with one person at a time. This is a very big change from when monogamous relationships were common.
The Rise of Constant Communication
Baby boomers had to use old-fashioned landline phones. But now, technology has changed a lot. Phone calls aren’t as common anymore, and texting is our main communication method. While baby boomers used to talk on the phone for a long time—many millennials would rather ignore a call and send a text asking what’s up. Those long talks on the phone with a cord to twirl are gone, replaced by endless texting.
Navigating Relationship Status
In the past, giving your fraternity pin to your girlfriend wasn’t common—despite what movies might show. But back then, deciding to be exclusive with someone was more straightforward than it is for millennials today. Nowadays, young couples often spend much time “talking” to each other before committing to a romantic relationship. During this phase, they’re interested in each other but haven’t made a full commitment yet.
The New Dating Scene
Many millennials shy away from using the word “date” when talking about spending time with someone they’re interested in. Unlike baby boomers, who were more direct about dating—millennials prefer to use terms like “hangout” to keep things casual and avoid seeming too serious too soon. They don’t want to lock things early.
Breaking Gender Stereotypes in Love
In the 1950s, women were usually expected to stay home and care for the family—but millennials think those ideas are old-fashioned. However, when it comes to dating, traditional gender roles are still pretty common. Things like who should ask who out or who should pay for dinner might still follow old-fashioned ideas. But young couples today are starting to question these old ways and make their own rules.
Recognizing Emotional Manipulation
“Gaslighting” is when one partner emotionally manipulates the other, making them feel like they’re to blame or crazy for being upset about the manipulator’s lousy behavior. This kind of abuse has been around for a long time—even before baby boomers and millennials. Thanks to Theodore Dorpat, we now have a name for it, which helps folks talk about it and figure out how to stop it.
How Movies Influence Online Dating
When online dating started becoming popular in the 1990s, some people were unsure about it—like with any new thing. However, for millennials, movies and TV shows have helped make it seem normal and okay to meet people online. Baby boomers didn’t have that kind of exposure to online dating in movies because there weren’t many movies about it back then.
The Importance of Protected Intimacy
In the baby boomer generation, people knew about safe intercourse—but it wasn’t as big of a deal until the 1980s. Even though casual intercourse was still common, like it was in the 1970s, folks started being more careful about their health. Because of worries about HIV and AIDS, there is now a big increase in buying and using condoms to stop STDs from spreading.
How Tech Connects Long-Distance Hearts
Back in the days before the internet and fancy gadgets, having a long-distance relationship like we see today was almost impossible. But then, in 2003, something amazing happened: Skype was invented! Suddenly, millennial couples who were far apart could see and talk to each other on video—making it much easier to stay connected, even if they were in different countries.