Lisa O
If you’ve had therapy before, you know it can be helpful but also awkward, especially in the beginning. Sharing your deepest thoughts and emotions with a stranger can feel scary, especially if you’re not used to opening up. You might worry if the therapy is going to work or if your issues are serious enough for therapy. That’s why we’re listing 15 things you should never tell your therapist and why.
Don’t Tell Lies
It’s important to be honest with your therapist because they need the real scoop to help you out. If you hold back on your feelings, experiences, or what you’ve been up to, they won’t have the full story to give you the best advice. It’s okay to feel awkward or shy about some stuff, but therapy is where you can be honest and make real strides forward in your journey.
Avoid Complaining About Your Previous Therapist
Talking about bad experiences with a past therapist won’t help your current therapy. It might steer you away from your current goals and make it harder to trust your new therapist. Instead of dwelling on the past—focus on what you want to achieve now and how your therapist can support you in moving forward positively.
Don’t Say You Want to Be Friends
Therapists keep things professional to ensure that therapy stays focused on your well-being. It’s normal to feel close to your therapist over time, but remember, therapy isn’t about making friends. Chatting about hanging out outside of sessions or trying to build a personal relationship can mess up these boundaries and make the therapy process complicated.
Don’t Confess Romantic Feelings
Therapists have rules about keeping a professional distance from their clients. Having romantic or personal feelings toward your therapist can make things awkward and ruin your therapy. You have to respect these boundaries so that therapy stays focused on helping you emotionally and personally without getting caught up in personal feelings.
Don’t Expect Your Therapist to Fix You
Therapy is like teamwork, in which your therapist guides and supports you. They give you tools, ideas, and plans to help you face challenges and make good changes in your life. But the most significant part of growing and getting better is up to you—putting what you learn into action in your everyday life. Therapy helps you better understand yourself and deal with challenging situations, but you must be involved and committed to progress.
Avoid Telling Half-Truths
Just like when you see a doctor, giving only some of the critical information or holding back parts of your story will work against you. Therapists need the whole picture to provide you with the best support and advice. Even if some topics are hard to talk about, being honest helps your therapist give you therapy that fits your needs.
Don’t Just Ask for Medication
While meds can be a big help with some mental health problems, therapy is important for long-term emotional growth. Engaging fully in therapy sessions helps you dig into what’s going on, learn how to handle things better, and make fundamental changes in your life beyond just taking pills. Your therapist will figure out the best way to help you that fits what you need most.
Resist Using Small Talk to Avoid Real Issues
Feeling nervous or uneasy in therapy is okay, especially when talking about sensitive topics. However, spending session time on small talk to dodge deeper emotional issues can slow down your progress. Therapy is a safe place where you can explore your feelings and thoughts with a professional guiding you. Being open and ready to tackle tough topics helps you understand yourself better and figure out how to handle your issues.
Never Make Offensive Remarks
Respect and being mindful are crucial in therapy. Making offensive jokes or comments about race, gender, or personal information can hinder your therapy progress and how you connect with your therapist. Therapists stick to rules to keep things supportive and non-judgmental. It’s key to communicate in a respectful way and have talks that help you understand yourself better and grow.
Avoid Discussing Other Clients
Keeping things confidential is a big deal in therapy. Your therapist has a legal and ethical duty to keep everyone’s privacy safe. Talking about other clients, even if you know them, breaks that trust and messes with how therapy works. Respecting confidentiality makes sure therapy stays a safe space where you can talk openly about your thoughts and feelings without worrying they’ll go beyond the room.
Don’t Apologize for Talking About Yourself
Therapy sessions are all about you—your chance to dig into your thoughts and feelings in a safe space. It’s key to put yourself first and open up without feeling bad about it. Your therapist is there to hear you out, get where you’re coming from, and help you handle difficult situations. Embracing this time to focus on yourself builds a strong connection with your therapist and moves you forward toward your goals.
Never Apologize for Your Emotions
Therapy is about exploring your emotions freely, without feeling judged. Lot of people feel guilty or embarrassed about their feelings—especially the tough ones. But being honest about how you feel helps your therapist understand you better and find better ways to help. Accepting your feelings as valid and worth talking about helps you grow and handle them better in therapy.
Avoid Sticking Only to Facts
While facts are important, therapy dives deeper into your feelings, beliefs, and what those experiences mean to you. Telling your therapist how you personally see things helps them understand your inner world better and figure out the best ways to help you. Having talks that mix facts with emotions gives you a clearer picture of what you’re going through and helps you grow personally in therapy.
Don’t Say Therapy Won’t Work for You
You might feel unsure about therapy, especially if it’s your first time seeking help. But thinking right from the start that therapy won’t help you might slow down your progress. Therapy works best when you and your therapist team up to tackle challenges, understand things better, and come up with ways to cope. Keeping an open mind can really help you feel better and grow personally.
Don’t Be Brutally Honest About Everything
Therapy is all about being honest and open, but there are some things that just don’t fit well in a therapy session. Saying things like criticizing your therapist’s looks or making harsh comments about others can make things awkward and mess with your therapy progress. It’s very important to be thoughtful and respectful when talking about sensitive or touchy topics in therapy.