20 Things That Can Destroy a Marriage

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Just like any relationship, marriages can be tricky. In fact, about half of American marriages end in divorce, often due to some pretty straightforward reasons. We’ll dive into the 20 most common issues that can break down a marriage. From not having enough family support to poor communication, cheating, money problems, and beyond, we’ll explore the key factors that can unravel even the strongest relationships.

Lack of Communication

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Poor communication often starts trouble in marriages. When couples don’t chat about their thoughts and feelings, it’s easy for misunderstandings and conflicts to pop up. This lack of talk can build up resentment over time. To fix this, make it a point to have regular, honest conversations where both partners can spill their thoughts without any fear of judgment.

Cheating and Betrayal

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Cheating can seriously break the trust that’s crucial in any marriage. The hurt from infidelity often leaves deep scars, making it challenging to fix the relationship. To tackle this, get professional counseling to figure out what led to the betrayal, work on rebuilding trust, and make sure both partners are committed to healing and moving forward together.

Financial Problems

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Money problems can stress out a marriage. Disagreements over spending, debt, and financial priorities often lead to constant arguments. To keep finances under control, make a joint budget, set financial goals together, and keep talking openly about money. Regularly check and tweak your financial plans to prevent conflicts from popping up.

Ignoring Disagreements

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Ignoring or dodging conflicts can let problems fester and grow over time. These unresolved issues can become bigger headaches and create emotional distance between you—experts advise addressing disputes as soon as they arise. Talk things out openly, listen carefully to each other’s concerns, and collaborate to find solutions that work for both of you. 

Lack of Family Support

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Without support from family or friends, couples can feel isolated and alone. This lack of backup can make marital problems worse and add extra stress. To avoid this, build a strong support network by keeping close ties with family and friends, and don’t be afraid to lean on them for advice and help when things get tough.

Different Life Goals

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When partners have different life goals, like varying opinions on having kids or career plans, it can spark a lot of tension. To sort this out, talk honestly about your long-term dreams and goals. Find some common ground and be ready to compromise or tweak your goals so they align better with each other’s aspirations.

Lack of Intimacy

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Emotional and physical intimacy is super important for a healthy marriage. Without it, you might feel disconnected and unhappy. To keep that spark alive, make time for each other with activities that bring you closer, like date nights, open chats, and physical affection. Prioritize your relationship to keep that deep connection strong.

Unrealistic Expectations

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Expecting your partner to meet all your needs can set you up for disappointment and frustration. Putting too much pressure on each other with unrealistic expectations can strain the relationship. So always remember that nobody’s perfect, and everyone has flaws. Instead, just focus on appreciating each other’s strengths and working together to tackle shortcomings.

Poor Conflict Resolution Skills

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How couples handle disagreements can really make or break their relationship. When conflict resolution skills are weak, small issues can quickly spiral into bigger problems, leaving things unresolved. To improve, work on staying calm during arguments, actively listening to each other’s points of view, and finding ways to compromise. Make it a routine to address conflicts in a respectful and constructive way.

Addiction Issues

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Substance abuse or other addictions can really put a lot of strain on a marriage. It often leads to trust issues, money problems, and emotional stress. Get professional help for treating the addiction and support each other through recovery. Tackling the addiction openly and working together on getting better can help rebuild and strengthen your relationship.

Neglecting the Relationship

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If you don’t put time and effort into your relationship—it can start to weaken. Marriage needs constant care and attention to stay strong. Make it a priority by spending time together, doing things you both enjoy and showing some appreciation. Keep checking in on your connection and put in the work to keep it lively and satisfying.

Lack of Trust

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Trust is a crucial part of any strong marriage. If broken or missing, it can lead to insecurity and many arguments. To build and keep that trust:

  1. Be honest, reliable, and open with each other.
  2. If faith has taken a hit, try to fix it by showing you’re dependable and truthful in everything you do.
  3. Keep proving that you’re loyal, and work together to mend any cracks in the trust.

Different Beliefs and Values

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Conflicting values, like different religious beliefs or moral principles, can stir up friction in a marriage. These differences can lead to disagreements and tension if you don’t handle them right. Respect each other’s values and discover ways to compromise or work through the differences together. Chatting openly about your values can help line up your perspectives and strengthen your relationship.

Parenting Disagreements

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Conflicts over how to parent can crank up the tension between partners. Disagreements on raising kids often lead to arguments and frustration. Talk openly about your parenting approaches and try to agree on strategies that match both of your values. By presenting a united front, you can bring more stability and consistency to your kids’ lives.

Poor Problem-Solving Skills

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Couples who have a hard time with problem-solving might struggle to tackle and fix issues effectively. If you’re not great at it, conflicts can keep popping up, and problems might remain unresolved. Work on developing problem-solving skills by teaming up to find solutions, being open to compromise, and getting outside help if needed.

Jealousy and Control

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Excessive jealousy can cause control issues and spark conflicts in a marriage. It usually comes from insecurity and can mess with trust and harmony. Tackle those insecurities by talking openly about your feelings and working on boosting your self-confidence. According to experts, you should build a trusting relationship by being transparent and supporting each other through it all.

Feeling Unappreciated

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Taking your partner for granted and not showing appreciation can build up feelings of resentment over time. Regularly expressing gratitude and acknowledging their efforts goes a long way in keeping your relationship strong. Make it a habit to show appreciation with small gestures, sincere compliments, and heartfelt thanks. These little acts can really brighten their day and help maintain a positive and loving vibe in your relationship.

Work-Life Imbalance

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Putting work ahead of personal time can really strain a marriage and make your partner feel neglected. When work takes over, you spend less time together, and stress levels go up. To balance things out, set clear boundaries between work and home life, make time for your partner, and manage stress in healthy ways.

Emotional Neglect

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Ignoring your partner’s emotional needs can put some serious distance between you and create dissatisfaction in the marriage. If you neglect their feelings—it can lead to loneliness and frustration. Show you care by listening actively, offering reassurance, and being there when they need you. Make emotional connection a priority to keep your bond strong.

Poor Health

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Physical and mental health issues can stress out your marriage, making things tougher for both of you. Health problems can mess with your mood, drain your energy, and affect your overall well-being. To tackle this, we need to support each other by encouraging healthy habits, getting medical help when necessary, and being there emotionally through tough times.