Devin Jacobs
Some people have a talent for making everyone else feel invisible. It’s subtle, frustrating, and usually exhausting to deal with. They follow predictable patterns that repeat across relationships and everyday interactions. And learning to identify such patterns is your first line of defense. So, let’s talk about the key signs to watch for.
Hijacks Every Conversation
Self-centered people have a knack for turning every chat into a one-person show. Whether you’re discussing work or weekend plans, they somehow twist the conversation to focus on themselves. You end up feeling dismissed, like your thoughts don’t matter, while they dominate every topic with their stories.
Expects Special Treatment Without Merit
From skipping lines at coffee shops to demanding special favors without reciprocation, these individuals move through daily life expecting royal treatment they haven’t earned. Their egotistical worldview creates unfair social dynamics, pushing others aside to satisfy unmerited demands. When reality denies these privileges, emotional outbursts reveal the fragility of their expectations.
Dismisses Others’ Emotions
Mention a bad day, and they’ll quickly shift the focus to their own experiences. It’s not always intentional, but it leaves conversations one-sided. Over time, this dismissiveness erodes trust and connection, which makes it hard for others to feel supported or truly understood around them.
Uses People As Tools
These folks treat relationships like vending machines—insert kindness, extract favors. They will befriend you enthusiastically when you’re valuable, then ghost you when the benefits dry up. Every conversation has an agenda, and every gesture hides a calculation. You’re not a person to them but a resource to be mined.
Deflects All Criticism
Try holding a self-absorbed person accountable and watch the mental gymnastics begin. Your legitimate concern gets twisted until somehow you’re apologizing to them. And the moment you raise a concern, excuses take over and responsibility vanishes, making it impossible to have an honest conversation when someone refuses to acknowledge their role.
Interrupts Boundaries Without Remorse
Establishing a boundary with them is an exercise in futility. You draw a line, and within days it’s been crossed like it was never there. Privacy disappears, and your “no” gets treated as a negotiation starter. The worst part? Zero awareness that anything inappropriate even happened.
Keeps Score Of Favors
Self-centered people never forget a favor. Any help you’ve given resurfaces years later, always when they need something. Every act of kindness turns into a debt they expect repaid. Genuine connection is just not there, which turns relationships into transactions, as if every gesture has a price instead of being freely offered.
Refuses To Share Resources
Self-centered people use common resources but try to guard them as if they own what’s meant to be shared with others. Snacks disappear the moment they are hungry. They’ll use the last of the coffee or printer paper without replacing it. They’ll borrow tools or supplies without returning them, and act offended when asked to pitch in.
Displays Outrage When Others Shine
Someone else’s achievement feels like a personal attack to such individuals. The room celebrates your promotion, but they’re visibly annoyed. Within minutes, they’re either dismissing your success or announcing their own accomplishments. Sharing the spotlight isn’t an option—they need all of it.
Overstates Their Hardships To Justify Behavior
Self-centered people exaggerate their struggles to gain sympathy and avoid responsibility. By making everything seem worse than it is, they justify their selfish actions and manipulate others into giving them a free pass. Meanwhile, they ignore how their behavior affects everyone around them.