Lisa O
Living with a roommate can be a great experience, but it often comes with moments of uncertainty—especially when you suspect they might be planning to move out. If you’ve been picking up on these clues, you may want to start preparing for a potential transition in your living arrangement.
They’ve Suddenly Become Very Secretive
If your roommate has started acting more secretive—such as taking phone calls behind closed doors, whispering, or quickly changing the topic when you walk into the room—it could be a red flag. This kind of behavior often suggests that they are planning something they haven’t shared with you, like moving out. While it’s possible they’re dealing with personal issues, if this secrecy is combined with other signs, moving could be on their mind.
They’re Selling or Giving Away Their Belongings
One of the biggest clues that your roommate is planning to leave is if they start unloading their personal belongings. They could be listing their furniture on online marketplaces, holding yard sales, or giving away clothes and other possessions. Downsizing their stuff is often a sign that they’re trying to make a move easier, particularly if they’re planning to relocate to a smaller space or a different city.
They’re Not Buying New Household Items
When people know they’re leaving, they tend to stop investing in things for the space they currently live in. If your roommate used to be proactive about buying household supplies—like cleaning products, kitchenware, or even toilet paper—but has suddenly stopped contributing, it could be a subtle sign that they’re on their way out. They might feel like it’s no longer worth spending money on shared items if they won’t be around much longer to use them.
They Mention Moving or Job Changes Casually
If your roommate has been casually bringing up job opportunities in other cities, talks about interviews they’ve had, or drops hints about wanting to “start fresh” somewhere else, this is a strong sign that they could be planning to move. These types of comments, even if they’re offhand, are often ways to test how you might react to the idea. Sometimes, people ease into big announcements by gauging the response to these hypothetical situations.
You’ve Noticed a Change in Their Attitude Toward the Apartment
When people know they’re leaving a place, they often become less concerned with its upkeep. If your roommate has suddenly become indifferent to things like cleaning, maintenance, or shared responsibilities, they might have mentally checked out. Perhaps they’ve stopped taking out the trash, washing dishes, or fixing things that break. They might do this because they don’t feel it’s their problem anymore, knowing that they’ll soon be gone.
They’re Meeting with Real Estate Agents or Browsing Housing Websites
If you notice your roommate spending time on housing websites or meeting with real estate agents, it’s a major clue that they’re looking for a new place to live. While some people browse out of curiosity, a sudden spike in this behavior is a strong indicator that they’re seriously considering a move.
Their Friends or Family Have Been Helping Them Pack
If you see boxes mysteriously appearing in their room or notice their friends and family dropping by more frequently to “help with something,” it could be because they’re quietly packing up. While it might not seem like much at first, if their room looks like it’s being slowly emptied out or if belongings are disappearing from common areas, your roommate could be in the process of preparing for a move.
They’re Not as Engaged in Household Decisions
Has your roommate stopped caring about decisions regarding the apartment? Maybe they used to be involved in picking out new furniture, deciding on grocery purchases, or planning bills, but now they seem uninterested. If they’re disengaging from household responsibilities or acting indifferent when you ask for their opinion, it could be because they don’t plan to be around much longer. People tend to disconnect from the details of a living arrangement when they’re preparing to leave it behind.
They’ve Changed Their Mailing Address
If your roommate’s mail has decreased significantly or if you notice them forwarding packages to another address, it’s a clear sign they might be moving out. People often change their mailing address when they’ve already secured a new place and are preparing to transition. A formal change of address is a big logistical step in moving, and if your roommate has started receiving fewer letters or bills at your shared place, it could mean they’re finalizing their relocation plans.
They’ve Become More Focused on Saving Money
Moving can be expensive, so if your roommate has suddenly become very budget-conscious—cutting back on outings, declining to chip in for shared expenses, or picking up extra work shifts—it might be because they’re preparing for the costs associated with moving. Rent deposits, moving trucks, and security deposits all require extra cash, so a shift toward saving money might be a clue that they’re getting ready to relocate.
They’re Spending More Time Away from Home
If your roommate is rarely home anymore, staying at a partner’s or friend’s place frequently, or taking extended trips, it could be because they’re already in the process of transitioning out of the apartment. They may be testing out living elsewhere before making the move official or gradually distancing themselves from the space. Extended time away often signals that they’re preparing for a lifestyle change, which could include moving out.
They’re No Longer Interested in Renewing the Lease
When the topic of renewing the lease comes up, does your roommate seem unenthusiastic or vague about committing? If they’re avoiding the conversation or seem hesitant to renew, this is a strong indicator that they’re thinking about moving. People who plan to stay usually want to secure their living situation, so a lack of interest in renewing the lease is a major cause that they may be planning to leave.
They’ve Started Avoiding Future Plans
If you’re trying to make plans for the future—like trips, parties, or events—and your roommate seems hesitant or non-committal, it could be because they’re unsure whether they’ll still be living with you. People who are planning to move tend to avoid committing to plans that extend past their expected move-out date. This avoidance can be a subtle sign that they’re getting ready to leave.
They’ve Requested More Privacy Lately
If your roommate has started locking their door more frequently, keeping things packed away, or requesting more privacy, it could be a sign that they’re preparing for a big change, such as moving out. The need for increased privacy often signals that they’re dealing with something they haven’t yet disclosed to you, such as looking for a new place or preparing to move.
You Notice a Shift in Their Attitude Toward You
Sometimes, the most obvious clue that your roommate is moving out is a shift in your relationship. If they seem distant, avoid conversation, or act emotionally checked out, it could be because they’ve already mentally moved on from the apartment. A change in their attitude toward you, especially if it feels like they’re pulling away, might mean they’re preparing to make an exit.