Lisa O
It can be hard to admit, but not everyone in your life is as genuine as they seem. Fake people can drain your energy, manipulate your trust, and make you question your worth. Recognizing the signs early can save you from emotional harm and help you build more authentic relationships. Here are 30 signs you might be surrounded by fake people.
They Only Reach Out When They Need Something
Fake people don’t bother maintaining regular, meaningful interactions unless it benefits them. You might notice they text or call only when they need a favor, like borrowing money, getting advice, or asking for connections. These interactions lack balance because they rarely check in to ask how you’re doing or offer help when you need it.
They Gossip About Others Constantly
Gossip is a key behavior of fake people, as they use it to bond with others and gain attention. They might tell you juicy stories about mutual acquaintances or share deeply personal information about someone else, often in a judgmental or mocking tone. While it might seem harmless, their willingness to betray others’ trust indicates they’re likely doing the same behind your back.
They Never Celebrate Your Successes
Fake people struggle to feel happy for others because they view success as a competition. When you share good news like a promotion, personal milestone, or accomplishment, they may downplay it with a dismissive “That’s nice” or change the topic to focus on themselves. Worse, they might criticize your achievement or suggest you didn’t truly earn it.
They’re Overly Nice to Your Face
Fake people are skilled at presenting a charming, friendly facade. They might shower you with compliments, agree with everything you say, or go out of their way to seem helpful. However, their excessive niceness often feels forced or calculated. This is a tactic to gain your trust or disarm you, masking their true intentions.
They Disappear When Times Get Tough
Life’s challenges reveal who your true friends are. Fake people are quick to vanish when you face hardships, whether it’s a financial struggle, a health issue, or emotional distress. They avoid offering support because it doesn’t benefit them or because they’re uncomfortable dealing with someone else’s problems. Their absence during tough times is a glaring sign that they’re only interested in the good times, not the realities of genuine friendship.
They Talk Behind Your Back
One of the most painful signs of fake people is discovering they’ve been betraying your trust by spreading rumors or saying negative things about you. They might vent frustrations about you to others or share personal details you confided in them, all while acting friendly to your face. This behavior reveals their lack of loyalty and willingness to sacrifice relationships to maintain their social standing or entertain others.
They Compete With You
Instead of celebrating your wins, fake people see them as opportunities to prove they’re better. If you share a story about your success, they might interrupt to share one of their own or subtly try to outshine you. This constant need to one-up others is rooted in their insecurity, as they feel validated only when they’re seen as superior.
They Only Show Up for Social Events
Fake people prioritize appearances over meaningful relationships. They’ll enthusiastically join parties, dinners, or other group gatherings but rarely make time for one-on-one interactions. This behavior shows that their primary interest is inbeing seen or gaining social clout rather than building genuine connections. If you try to spend time with them outside these events, they may seem disinterested or unavailable.
They’re Always Playing the Victim
Fake people excel at making themselves the center of attention by portraying themselves as victims. Whether it’s blaming others for their mistakes, exaggerating minor inconveniences, or complaining endlessly, they expect sympathy without offering it in return. This behavior drains emotional energy and makes relationships feel one-sided, as they rarely show gratitude or accountability.
They Never Keep Their Promises
Fake people are quick to make promises they don’t intend to keep. They might enthusiastically agree to plans or commitments but later cancel without explanation or offer flimsy excuses. Their unreliability shows a lack of respect for your time and effort, leaving you frustrated and questioning their sincerity. Over time, this pattern ruins trust and reveals their lack of genuine investment in the relationship.
They Constantly Criticize You
Fake people often disguise their criticism as “honesty” or “tough love,” but their intent is to undermine your confidence. They may nitpick your choices, appearance, or achievements, making you second-guess yourself. This behavior often stems from their insecurities, as putting others down gives them a sense of control or superiority. True friends offer constructive feedback; fake ones simply aim to make you feel small.
They Use You for Personal Gain
Fake people view relationships as opportunities to advance their own goals. Whether it’s networking, financial help, or gaining access to your social circle, they’re always calculating how you can benefit them. Once they’ve achieved their objective, they may distance themselves or drop the pretense of friendship entirely. This behavior reveals their self-centered nature and lack of genuine care.
They Change Their Personality Around Others
Fake people often act like social chameleons, altering their behavior, opinions, and personality based on who they’re interacting with. While adaptability can sometimes be a positive trait, in this case, it signals a lack of authenticity. For example, they might agree with everything you say in private but suddenly adopt a different stance in front of others to gain approval or avoid conflict.
They’re Always Jealous
Jealousy from fake people isn’t always obvious; it often hides behind subtle digs, passive-aggressive remarks, or a lack of acknowledgment. If you achieve something significant like a promotion, personal milestone, or new relationship, they might respond with faint praise or try to overshadow your success by redirecting attention to themselves.
They Take More Than They Give
Fake people have an innate ability to exploit relationships for their own benefit. Whether it’s borrowing money, asking for advice, or leaning on you for emotional support, they often expect you to give without offering much in return. Over time, this imbalance becomes draining, leaving you feeling more like a resource than a valued friend or partner.
They Avoid Deep Conversations
Fake people prefer to keep things light and surface-level because deeper conversations require vulnerability and sincerity. When you try to discuss personal topics, share struggles, or open up emotionally, they might deflect, change the subject, or respond with vague platitudes. This reluctance to engage in meaningful dialogue highlights their discomfort with genuine connections.
They Don’t Respect Your Boundaries
Boundaries are essential for healthy relationships, but fake people often ignore or push past them. Whether it’s showing up uninvited, dismissing your “no,” or pressuring you into uncomfortable situations, their disregard for your limits shows a lack of respect. They might act entitled to your time, energy, or resources, making you feel guilty for asserting yourself.
They Act Differently Around Important People
Fake people’s behavior often shifts dramatically in the presence of someone they perceive as influential or powerful. They might become overly flattering, eager to please, or even completely ignore you to focus on impressing the other person. This change in demeanor reveals their opportunistic nature and tendency to prioritize social gain over genuine relationships.
They Always Have an Agenda
Fake people rarely do things out of the goodness of their hearts. Whether it’s attending an event, offering help, or starting a conversation, their actions often have an ulterior motive. They may be seeking favors, social connections, or validation, making their interactions feel calculated rather than genuine. This constant scheming can leave you questioning their intentions, as their focus seems to be on what they can gain rather than building a meaningful connection.
They’re Quick to Criticize Others
Fake people frequently put others down to make themselves feel superior. They might gossip, point out flaws, or make cutting remarks about mutual friends or coworkers. This negativity often extends to you, as their need to assert dominance means they’ll eventually turn their critical gaze your way. While they may frame their critiques as “honest observations,” their tendency to focus on others’ shortcomings reveals their insecurity and lack of compassion.
They’re Unreliable
Flaky behavior is a hallmark of fake people. They might agree to plans enthusiastically but cancel at the last minute, often with a flimsy excuse. Over time, their inconsistency shows that they don’t value your time or the effort it takes to maintain a relationship. This unreliability makes it difficult to trust or rely on them, leaving you feeling frustrated and undervalued.
They Overshare But Don’t Listen
Conversations with fake people often feel one-sided. They might dominate discussions by oversharing about their ownlives, problems, or achievements but show little interest in hearing your thoughts or feelings. This self-centered behavior can leave you feeling invisible and unimportant in the relationship. Genuine connections require mutual interest and active listening, but fake people rarely offer these qualities.
They Exaggerate Their Support
Fake people often make grand claims about being there for you but fail to follow through when it matters. For example, they might say, “You can count on me anytime!” but are mysteriously unavailable when you actually need help. Their exaggerated promises are designed to make them look good but lack the substance of real support. Over time, their inability to back up their words with actions becomes a clear sign of insincerity.
They Avoid Responsibility
Fake people are experts at deflecting blame and avoiding accountability. If they hurt you or make a mistake, they might offer excuses, deny their actions, or even blame you for the situation. This refusal to take responsibility shows a lack of maturity and respect for the relationship. Genuine people acknowledge their mistakes and make an effort to repair the damage, while fake ones prioritize their ego over your feelings.
They Steal Credit
Fake people aren’t afraid to take credit for your ideas, achievements, or efforts. Whether it’s in a professional setting or a personal context, they’ll subtly position themselves as the source of success. This behavior reveals their lack of integrity and willingness to undermine others for their own gain. Over time, their tendency to prioritize their image over fairness and honesty becomes a significant red flag.
They Downplay Your Feelings
Fake people often struggle with empathy, so when you open up about your emotions or challenges, they may dismiss your feelings as insignificant or exaggerated. Instead of offering support or validation, they might brush you off with comments like “You’re overreacting” or “It’s not a big deal.” This behavior not only invalidates your emotions but also discourages you from sharing openly in the future.
They’re Quick to Cut Ties
Fake people often view relationships as disposable, and the moment the connection no longer serves their interests, they’re quick to walk away. They might ghost you, stop responding to messages, or withdraw entirely without explanation. This behavior highlights their lack of emotional investment and loyalty. It’s especially hurtful when you’ve put effort into maintaining the relationship only to realize they were never truly committed.
They Love Attention
For fake people, being the center of attention is more important than fostering meaningful relationships. They often go out of their way to seek validation, whether by exaggerating their accomplishments, creating unnecessary drama, or steering every conversation back to themselves. This relentless need for the spotlight can leave you feeling overshadowed and unheard in their presence.
They Avoid Accountability for Hurting You
When fake people hurt you, they rarely take responsibility for their actions. Instead of apologizing or making amends, they might deny what they did, blame you for overreacting, or try to justify their behavior. This lack of accountability reveals their unwillingness to reflect on their actions or grow as a person. Genuine people acknowledge their mistakes and actively work to repair the damage, but fake people prioritize their pride and ego over your feelings.
You Feel Drained After Interacting With Them
One of the clearest signs of a fake person is how you feel after spending time with them. If you consistently leave interactions feeling emotionally exhausted, anxious, or uneasy, it’s a strong indicator that their presence is toxic. Fake people often project negativity, demand attention, or drain your energy by making everything about themselves. Over time, these interactions take a toll on your mental well-being and leave you questioning the relationship.