Johann Hunt
Breakups feel like someone hit a pause button on life and, at the same time, pressed a fast-forward on emotions. The empty side of the bed, the old chats? It’s a minefield waiting to explode. All of this might sound familiar but working on these 20 biggest pain points will actually help you get on a path filled with crazy growth and happiness.
Stop Stalking Their Socials
Nothing fuels heartbreak like digital breadcrumbs. The more you scroll, the more you trap yourself in a loop of overanalyzing their posts, likes, and new connections. It’s not just about breaking the habit but about breaking the emotional tether. Out of sight, out of your way to healing.
Don’t Rush Into Rebounds
Loneliness is loud after a breakup, and it makes distractions more tempting. But new faces won’t erase old feelings. If you use someone as an emotional crutch, it delays the real work of healing. Love should be a choice, not a bandage. So, give yourself the space to reconnect with yourself first.
Avoid “Accidental” Run-Ins
Every familiar place doesn’t need a familiar face. If their usual haunts feel magnetic, take a different route, explore new spaces, and claim fresh experiences. Healing happens in new locations. What feels like avoidance is actually self-preservation. It gives your mind room to detach and grow.
Quit Digging For Gossip
Friends don’t need to be your personal investigators. The more you ask, the more you anchor yourself to a past that’s no longer yours. Their life isn’t your business anymore, and that’s a good thing. The less you know, the lighter your heart will feel.
Let Go Of Old Memories
Objects carry weight—physical, emotional, and mental. That hoodie, that playlist, that drawer full of forgotten trinkets? They hold energy you don’t need. If it hurts to look at, it’s time to box it up, donate it, or toss it. Your space should feel like yours again.
Stay True To Yourself
Heartbreak can make you question who you are. Maybe you’re tempted to change, to prove something, to feel different. However, drastic shifts made from pain rarely lead to growth. So, instead of running from yourself, lean into what has always made you feel alive.
No More Drunk Texts
Alcohol makes bad ideas seem brilliant, but that 2 AM text isn’t closure. It’s a setback disguised as courage. If you can’t trust yourself after a few drinks, make it impossible to slip. Delete, block, or hand your phone to a friend. The future-you deserves better.
Drop The Rose-Colored Glasses
Memory has a way of editing out the bad, leaving only a highlight reel that makes you wonder why it ended at all. Stop romanticizing someone who wasn’t right for you. If you must revisit the past, remember the full picture—not just the pretty parts.
Don’t Force A Friendship
Going straight from love to friendship is like trying to unburn a toast. The raw emotions still exist, even if you pretend they don’t. So, that time apart is clarity, not cruelty. Let the space do its work. If real friendship was possible, you wouldn’t be forcing it.
Ignore Their New Relationship
Did you see them with someone new? It must have been a gut punch. On the other hand, their next chapter isn’t your story. So, don’t fixate on their love life. It only delays your healing. You don’t need to win a race that doesn’t exist. Just keep your eyes on your new path forward.
Stop Carrying All The Blame
You can’t take full responsibility for everything that went wrong. Why? Because breakups aren’t solo performances. When you solely hold yourself responsible, it warps reality and keeps you in a guilt loop. Even if you make mistakes, healing isn’t about punishment. It’s about learning, growing, and understanding that relationships are never just one person’s burden to bear.
Feel, Don’t Just Distract
Busyness can make you forget, but it won’t make you heal. Work, parties, and constant plans can only mute emotions for so long before they come roaring back. The only way out is through. Let yourself feel, process, and release. That’s where real healing happens.
Stop Living In “What-Ifs”
Replaying every moment, searching for where things went wrong, or dreaming of alternate endings? That only keeps you stuck in a story that’s already finished. The past won’t change, but your future will—if you let it. Don’t waste your energy writing a chapter that you’ve already lived.
Don’t Isolate Yourself
Isolation feels easier when you’re hurting, but solitude can quickly turn into a trap. The people who care about you? They don’t see you as broken. They see you. Let them remind you of who you were before the heartbreak. Connection speeds up healing more than time ever will.
Stop Comparing Your Journey
Healing isn’t a competition, but some days make it seem that way. If they look fine while you’re still struggling, remember: people show what they want to show. They may not be displaying their lowest moments. And however they deal with it, their process isn’t yours, and your healing is only about you.
Heal At Your Own Pace
Healing doesn’t follow a schedule. No timer goes off when you’re “supposed” to be over it. Some days will feel light. Others will drag you backward. Both are normal. Stop measuring your progress against expectations. You’re not behind; you’re just on your timeline.
Don’t Give Up On Your Goals
It’s easy to let everything slide when you’re drowning in heartache. But your dreams? They’re still waiting for you. A breakup doesn’t mean you should stop dreaming and achieving. It’s a chance to hit reset. Shift the energy you once gave to them back onto yourself.
Prioritize Your Self-Care
Grief can sneak into your routines, replacing self-care with survival mode. You start skipping workouts, eating through stress, or neglecting rest. It might feel harmless, but they chip away at you. So take care of yourself. It’s not about moving on; it’s about creating a great future.
Stop Undermining Yourself
A breakup doesn’t define you. It doesn’t make you unlovable, undeserving, or unworthy. You get to decide what happens next. Who you become after heartbreak is up to you. Turn the page, start fresh, and become someone who’ll make you proud.
Never Stop Believing In Love
Finally, we’re here. One bad ending doesn’t mean all stories end the same. So, don’t swear off love because of one heartbreak. It will still keep you locked in the past. Remember, love isn’t the villain—pain is. And pain doesn’t last forever. When you’re ready, love will find you again in ways you never expected.