The Very Best of Craigslist Detroit Ads

Detroit, Michigan is special for so many reasons. It’s the birthplace of the Motown Sound, and residents of Detroit eat more potato chips than any other city in the nation. It’s a city where cars once rumbled off the assembly lines and where the first urban freeway was built. As it is a city of invention and innovation, Detroit also knows how to sell things, as it supplied 75% of all liquor during prohibition. Detroit also has its own floating zip code, The J. W. Westcott II, that sails along the he Detroit River, which makes it the only boat that doubles as a post office.

In Detroit the summers can be red hot and the winters are freezing making it a place for the stout of heart who carry on the city’s diverse and eclectic spirit. It’s no doubt the residents of The Motor City have unusual things and services to buy, sell and trade.

Here are some of the craziest Craigslist Detroit ads.

Creepy Cross

If you’ve ever wanted to own your very own haunted crucifix, this ad is for you. It’s listed as Haunted Cross Paranormal ghost evil spirit entity dead demon, http://detroit.craigslist.org/mcb/jwl/5630530958.html. The seller goes into the eerie things that have occurred since his wife brought this religious article home. He claims, “I do not believe in ghosts but enough is enough,” so it’s going to whomever will buy it, but does not give a price. There is a warning, though, for the buyer to beware, as “I am done. I no longer want this in my home. Buy this item at your own risk, I will not take it back and I will not be responsible.” The cross looks innocent enough, but apparently it sent a wedding picture crashing to the floor and made roses “bow down”.

Pick a Winner

Why settle for a plain old boring toilet seat when you can get What? Lucite Toilet Seat Kentucky Derby Racetrack Horse Tickets, http://detroit.craigslist.org/okl/cbd/5637728097.html. Among the gorgeous details embedded in this see through seat is a two dollar bill and assorted ticket stubs, and it is crowned with a golden horseshoe. The seller says it is great if “you like that little bit of quirk that gets a conversation started?” If you buy this for just $194.50, you are sure to get some comments when folks use your bathroom.

Godfather Memorial Poster

Remember that scene when Micheal Corleone commits his very first murder? You can have that image immortalized in an iconic “AL PACINO POSTER“, http://detroit.craigslist.org/okl/clt/5662241707.html, showing young Mikey drawing the gun he found behind the toilet to fire in the Italian restaurant. It is made in the UK, so apparently someone over there thought this creepy movie still would make a cool poster. Guys should think twice before laying out $50 for this artwork, as you may run off your date if she sees that gracing your living room, or worse your bedroom.

If You’re Feeling “Nastolgic”

The ad says that this nastolgic working phone, http://detroit.craigslist.org/okl/clt/5671295787.html, “works great”. The photo of the phone in the ad shows that this old finger dialing phone is quite old and is “hunter green.” How you would hook this phone to see if it actually works would be the challenge. It sits on an end table also graced by a circa 1970s lime green clock. A second photo of the phone shows the desk phone “off the hook” in case you prefer this tactic to just putting your phone on “silent” if you’re feeling “nastolgic”.

Foreclosure Pokemon Agent

This ad is titled: Love POKEMON GO? Love Real Estate, THIS is the job for you!!!, http://detroit.craigslist.org/wyn/rej/5688386237.html. Unfortunately, the body of the ad mentions nothing about Pokemon, and it’s all about making deals for folks facing foreclosure.The ad states that the person “Must be able to knock on doors and must be a people person.” Considering the lengths that some Pokemon Go will go to playing the game, perhaps the ad is wisely titled.

Pokemon Place

This For Rent Ad, Westminster Park has Pokemon!! 1br – 604ft, http://detroit.craigslist.org/wyn/apa/5684050593.html, features a meme of Keanu Reeves, from Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure, saying, “What if there are no Pokemon Because Someone Actually Caught Them All?” The ad says that you’ll “FIND LOTS OF POKEMON CHARACTERS ON THE PROPERTY ONCE YOU BECOME A RESIDENT!”

It’s Not Called The Motor City for Nothing!

This Best of Craigslist Ad shows that this car seller has a sense of humor. He has a behemoth for sale!, http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/11314545.html. It’s very inciting, as the poster states, “For a limited time, you, yes, YOU, can purchase your very own land yacht!”. He is selling due to recently acquiring some cash and having a “desire for reliable transportation, I have recently purchased a car that is actually younger than I am.”.

Poster How-To

The Best of Craigslist also features a Detroit seller offering a book for sale ironically called Craigslist for Dummies Vol 1, http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/det/961151827.html. The poster does offer some free advice in the ad:”If you already know what’s wrong and keep misposting anyway, don’t complain when your ad has been flagged for deletion. Before you cry “FOUL”, remember how much the ad cost you per line.” He also warns not to misspell ads.

Calling It Like It Is

This self-titled vintage Ugly Lamp, http://detroit.craigslist.org/mcb/atq/5690168646.html, can be yours for only $20. It needs a new home as the owner has a soft spot for ugly lamps but just inherited two more ugly ones, so this one has to go. This lamp was in the home for many years, so it should go to a “new loving family”.

Zombie Smarts

If you and 11 of your friends ever wanted the experience of a zombie attack, this ad is for you! Escape Room! Trapped in a Room with a Zombie, http://detroit.craigslist.org/okl/tix/5671703722.html. The ad features a cartoon of people trying to escape a room, while a chained up zombie is grabbing at them while chained to the floor. The ad states that “Don’t worry, it’s not a haunted house: It’s a fun and exhilarating experience that will leave you laughing and breathless (if you survive).”